The Handshake: Has Its True Meaning Been Lost?

Has Its True Meaning Been Lost?

I was watching a favorite TV show that my mother and I used to watch before she passed. Both of us shared many common bonds, and one was our love for extended education. To us, every environment was an opportunity to learn, so even at the end of the day, Wheel of Fortune was an all-time favorite. If my older siblings hogged the TV, I would venture off to my mother’s room and find a spot at the foot of her bed, making sure not to interrupt her time with Pat Sajak and Vanna White.

Recently, I was watching a new episode of Wheel of Fortune with the new host, Ryan Seacrest, and Vanna White. I often tune in, reminiscent of my mom. On this particular episode, the contestant happened to be a middle-aged Black guy—in good shape and sharp as a tack. He won the whole spin-off prize for major bucks! As always, Ryan came in for the congratulatory handshake, and the brother reached back out to receive it. But then, the standard shake turned into the shake-shake. You know how we do—clap it up, down low, clinch it, maybe even pull it back and snap! The shake-shake.

What Is the Handshake? (The What)

The formal definition of a handshake is simple: “a clasping usually of right hands by two people (as in greeting or farewell).” A secret handshake is a distinct variation—a greeting that indicates membership in or loyalty to a club, clique, or subculture. The typical secret handshake involves placing one’s fingers or thumbs in a specific position. It is recognized instantly by fellow members while seeming like a normal greeting to outsiders. This is most frequently associated in the popular consciousness with college fraternities, fraternal orders, and secret societies—some of which are not so secret.

In scripture, Paul describes leaders giving the “right hand of fellowship” to show agreement and unity in their mission (Galatians 2:9). Historically, a handshake can be a sign of agreement or betrayal—and sometimes both. We see this hidden counsel in scripture:

John 11:49–53
49 And one of them, named Caiaphas, being the high priest that same year, said unto them, Ye know nothing at all,
50 Nor consider that it is expedient for us, that one man should die for the people, and that the whole nation perish not.
51 And this spake he not of himself: but being high priest that year, he prophesied that Jesus should die for that nation;
52 And not for that nation only, but that also he should gather together in one the children of God that were scattered abroad.
53 Then from that day forth they took counsel together for to put him to death.

Who Is the Handshake From? (The Who)

The “Who” behind the handshake is usually an individual entering a simple greeting or an agreement between parties. In John 11, the agreement was discussed in private and settled in secret. But let’s look at how it works in the opposite situation: a handshake given in the open, but carrying a secret meaning.

The receiver of the handshake is the secondary “Who.” If a deal is made by a mere proposal or offer without anything tangible exchanging hands, people nowadays might call that a “lick and a promise”—implying the gesture is worthless. In times past, however, a handshake was absolute suretyship for an individual, land, cattle, or any commodity. To “shake on it” was a binding contract, and if you spit on your hand first, it was considered the supreme bond. Giving a secret handshake was a way to silently signal the receiver of your alliance, allegiance, and that you were on the same side of the ball, so to speak.

Where and When Do We Shake? (The Where & When)

The When: A handshake can happen almost anywhere in the open as a common greeting or token of acceptance. Even during intense sporting events like wrestling, boxing, or football, opponents are required to shake on it before and after, meaning “no hard feelings.” Freemasons are among the long-standing users of secret “grips” (similar to handshakes) used as tokens. A handshake might be shared between a lawyer and a judge, or out on the golf course, where some of the biggest business deals in history are made with just a simple grip.
The Where: It happens in the completely ordinary, everyday flow of life. It happens while you are watching Wheel of Fortune with Ryan Seacrest and Vanna White on your late mother’s birthday. Laughing out loud at the TV, seeing that brother give Seacrest the shake-shake was a clear sign of acceptance bestowed upon Ryan. It wasn’t just a polite shake of congratulations; it was the shake-shake. You know how we do—clap it up, down low, clinch it, pull it back, and snap.

Why Do We Keep At It? (The Why)

In its most primitive form, a handshake remains one of the highest symbols of agreement or acceptance, whether used for good or for bad. It has always been a simple way of informing a recipient of who you are, where your allegiances lie, and where your alliances stand. Sometimes, it is simply the right hand of fellowship.

Why do we keep at it? Maybe it is just our human way of bonding. Yet, there is no greater bond than the love of God:

John 3:16
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

Does God want us to bond? Absolutely, yes. He wants us to bond to Him first, and then to our neighbor. In fact, scripture uses the word love instead of bond to describe the two greatest commandments. In real life, your true enemies rarely shake your hand unless it is the handshake of deception.

The adversary operates in loud, blinding chaos—thunderstorms, gunbursts, panic, and terror. He wants to overwhelm your senses so you cannot think straight. In contrast, God whispers because He desires intimacy. He steps into our timeline to:

Shield us from traps the enemy has laid completely out of our line of sight.

Test our obedience in small, quiet decisions so we can handle the big, chaotic moments.

Build our faith so that when we survive the storm, we can look back and trace His voice directly to our rescue.

How to Tune Your Ears: 3 Practical Steps (The How)

How do we stop brushing these holy promptings aside as mere coincidences? Here are three practical steps to help you tune your spiritual frequency:

Practice Immediate Obedience: When you feel a sudden, harmless urge to shift your position, check an electrical line, or call a loved one, do it immediately. Don’t rationalize it away or wait until it makes logical sense. Obedience sharpens your spiritual hearing.
Silence the Noise: The enemy keeps our lives packed with constant noise, entertainment, and stress so our minds are too cluttered to perceive a whisper. Intentionally create quiet spaces in your day—even just 10 minutes of silence—to sit and listen.
Test the Frequency: If a prompting brings a wave of frantic panic and confusion, it is likely the adversary trying to intimidate you. If the nudge brings a clear, sober instruction followed by an underlying sense of peace, that is the Holy Spirit.

When I stood up from my computer desk on July 4th, it didn’t make logical sense. I was just enjoying my evening. But my spirit recognized the Commander’s voice. When we stop giving the adversary credit for our survival, we start realizing just how active, vocal, and protective our Father truly is.

Share Your Experience with the bigCOMMUNITY

The quietest whispers often lead to our loudest praises. I want to hear from you today.

Have you ever ignored a quiet “nudge” only to regret it later, or followed an unexplainable prompting that saved you from trouble?
What is one area of your life right now where you need to quiet the noise and listen for that small, still voice?

Let’s talk about it in the comments below. Share your story, your insights, or simply drop a prayer asking for clearer spiritual ears. Let’s build up each other’s faith right here!